Tuesday, December 14, 2010

'Tis the Season

Well it's the end of another year here at UCB headquarters.  Most of the staff here have completed their year end reports (*ahem* Klevin) and they've been printed, bound and sent off to stakeholders far and wide.  It's time for celebrations all around. So whether you're celebrating the birth of baby Jesus, commemorating the rededication of the Holy Temple in Jerusalem, or studying the Nguzu Saba, make sure you take time to stop and remember what the holidays are really all about: buying shit!

This is a good year for the gift of new music.  With such a musical goldmine to choose from like flashy tit-pop acts (Katy Perry), lesbianic second comings of Leif Garrett (Justin Bieber), shitty overproduced covers of songs you wish would just go away (Glee soundtrack), "country" artists (Taylor Swift), hey lookit me salmonella (Lady Gaga), and just plain dog crap (Black Eyed Peas), there is literally something for everybody.  So hit your record stores or wherever the hell kids buy music at these days and pump some money back into the music business so we can continue to enjoy the fruits of their collective labors.


Baron said...

Being a strict and pious Alsatian Anabaptist, the only record allowed in my house is "Absolute Amish", with timeless hits like "the sound of a hammer against a nail", "the sound of milk squiting into a milk bucket" and "the sound of the old squeeky wheel of my wagon and the wind in my beard".

We're all ready to crank it up!

Adelle the Great said...

Lesbianic second coming of... Russ- you are a genius. A sick & twisted one, but a genius none the less.

And Baron, that comment was pure win.

Boozelele said...

Why isn't there a UCB christmas CD? It would sell like hotcakes. Or cupcakes. Or at least crabcakes.

DeG said...

I'm with Booze on this one. It could feature such hits as: "Klavin got ran over by a Reindeer", "Yule all can suck it", "Deachy Claus is coming to town", "Have a Grumpy, Grumpy Christmas", "Nu tändas tusen juleljus, Bitches!", "Quelle est cette odeur dégoûtant?","Uki Songs We've Heard While High" and "Great Queen Adellesauce".

(Did I forget anyone?)

Happy Chrismahanakwanzakha, Bitches!

RussBuss said...

@DeG: you forgot perennial favorite, "聖誕快樂,我的排尿燒傷"

Adelle the Great said...

Hahaha. I swear I only come here for the comments. Yule Can All Suck It might actually not be a bad idea... guys?

dktoller said...

Oh my. I'd love to watch a K-Tel style commercial for UCB Does Christmas. Just do two lines of the song and move on. I smell collab... or maybe that's just Baron's cow.

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