It must be because I am an educated man that I often get asked to settle bets. 'Lets ask Kevin, he will know". I'm a wealth of useless trivia. For example did you know that tsunamis travel at the speed of a jumbo jet? Or that the animal that kills the most humans every year is the mosquito? Or that Tokyo is largest city in the world? Or that KLM now flies five times a week to Rwanda?
And here's something else; did you know Lady Gaga is actually a dude? Now you do.
Everyone knows that the Beatles were the greatest rock band ever. It's a given. No question there. But did you know that Led Zeppelin is second and The Who is third? I bet you didn't. But its true. Oh, and worst band of all time? Journey, followed by Foreigner.
Another question I often get asked "What is the best Patrick Swayze movie ever?". This is a tricky one, but if you said Roadhouse or Point Break you would be wrong, its actually Red Dawn. Little known fact.
And speaking of movies... the best movies ever? Duh, The Big Lebowski, Mulholland Drive, and Super Troopers. Everyone should already know this.
Best television shows of all time? Easy - Seinfeld, The Andy Griffith Show, and Star Trek.
Best ethnic food? Mexican, Thai, Italian. Best fast food? Wendy's.
First man on the moon? Neil Armstrong. Winner of 8 Tour De France's? Lance Armstrong. Great Trumpeter? Louis Armstrong. Best child's toy? Stretch Armstrong.
Current biggest a-hole in the world? Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker.
Any other questions you have, just let me know. I'm here to help.
6 comments:
i completely agree with your ethnic food line-up however i call bullshit on best Swayze movie. Dirty Dancing was his finest hour, for serious!
Oh, Magic Booze-Ball, I'm curious where The Police & U2 fall on the worst bands of all time list?
@adelle U2 is definitely in the top 5 worst bands.
@russ It's not negotiable, Red Dawn is his best. WOLVERINES!!!! (also Charlie Sheen's best movie I might add)
I was doubtful, but Red Dawn convinced me you know your stuff. Problem is, with the internet and iPhones and all that, I'm not sure there's much use for people like you anymore.
OTOH, if I ever find myself phone-less, half-drunk, and surrounded by ukuleles in a field wondering who runs the largest US-owned brewery, I'll know who to talk to.
"@adelle U2 is definitely in the top 5 worst bands."
And that is why I love you.
The chair is against the wall. The chair is against the wall.
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